Going Batty

Almost as soon as we moved into our new home last summer, so did an uninvited guest—a bat.

He (though it might have been a she) took up residence under our screened porch. The underside of the porch has open support beams beneath its deck flooring. In one corner near the back door to the lower level, a skinny little slot between two beams made a perfect bat home. Not quite as inviting to a bat as a bat cave, but almost. We saw the bat’s droppings before we found the bat, but upon investigation we espied him snoozing in the narrow opening.

Over the next couple of weeks, the bat came and went, while we pondered what to do. We didn’t have a lot of experience with bats.

In the thirty-five years we lived in our last house, we only noticed one bat. It, too, took up residence in the boards under our deck. We called the city’s Animal Control Department, but they didn’t have much interest in helping. We didn’t want to let the bat stay, because we had small children at the time, and bats can carry rabies. (Though they also keep down the inset population.)

Finally, my husband knocked that bat out of its bedroom with a broom. Unfortunately for both of them, the bat landed on the ground and fluttered around, unable to get off the ground and fly away. The kids were watching (from a distance) and shrieked.

My husband, hero of the day to children and bats, scooped the poor critter up in a shovel and launched it skyward. The bat flew off and never returned.

When we found our 2019 bat squatter, my husband debated using the same tactic—scooping the bat out of its narrow den and tossing it into the air. But the opening was really too narrow to push or coax the bat out without potentially hurting him.

So my husband waited until the bat was away one day, then he tacked a piece of screen over the opening. No more bat cave. We never saw that bat again.

We screened out the 2019 bat

Fast forward to the summer of 2020. A month or two ago, another bat found our front porch. Again, the droppings were the first indication we were attracting little beasties.

Our 2020 bat at the top of our front porch

Unlike with our earlier bat friends, this bat found a location too far above the ground to reach with a broom. The ceiling of our front porch is at least twelve feet high. It doesn’t look nearly as cozy to me as the slot under our screened porch. But it is protected from the elements, and I am not a bat, so my tastes might differ from that of small mammalia. This bat returned for many nights running.

In recent days, however, we have not seen the bat. But we know he still returns, based on the evidence he leaves behind, which necessitate frequent sweeping of the front porch.

I don’t know what we can do about this bat. As I said, we can’t reach it with a broom. We can’t screen over the open space. These are the only bat-removal systems we have perfected.

My husband suggested using a battery operated sound and light rodent repellent, like one he purchased to keep mice out of his rowing shell. That boat is stored in an open-air boatyard, and mice seem to think the fabric of his boat cover makes really good nest material. At least they haven’t attacked the actual boat yet. But I’m concerned the neighbors will object to the device’s flashing strobe and random noises.

What experience do you have in getting rid of unwanted critters?

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