February 17 is National Random Acts of Kindness Day. This day originated in New Zealand, although there it is celebrated on September 1. But I think random acts of kindness fit well in the depth of our Northern Hemisphere winter.
As of the morning of February 17 this year, Kansas City has not been above freezing since February 5—an almost two-week spell of dismal gloom. I have shoveled snow on several occasions during this frigid period. The first couple of times I shoveled the neighbor’s walks as a random act of kindness, but by the last shoveling I had given that up. Unfortunately, my kindness diminishes with the temperatures.
Last fall I participated in a church program, part of which was to learn more about a few Catholic saints of our choice. I chose three of my namesakes—St. Therese of Lisieux (whom my mother designated as my patron saint), St. Teresa of Avila, and Mother Teresa (now canonized as St. Teresa of Calcutta). I looked up sayings by all three of these holy women, and one common theme emerged—small daily acts of kindness.
Here are some quotes from each of these saints:
From St. Therese of Lisieux, a French Carmelite nun who died of tuberculosis when she was twenty-four:
I applied myself above all to practice quite hidden little acts of virtue.
A word, a kindly smile, will often suffice to gladden a wounded and sorrowful heart.
Remember that nothing is small in the eyes of God. Do all that you do with love.
From St. Teresa of Avila, a Spanish Carmelite nun and mystic:
Accustom yourself continually to make many acts of love, for they enkindle and melt the soul.
Always think of yourself as everyone’s servant.
From Mother Teresa:
Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.
Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.
Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.
And, while not related directly to kindness, I discovered some other marvelous quotes from St. Teresa of Avila about civility. I wish everyone in public office today, regardless of political persuasion, would heed her admonitions:
Be gentle to all and stern with yourself.
Never affirm anything unless you are sure it is true.
Never compare one person with another: comparisons are odious.
Never exaggerate, but express your feelings with moderation.
To have courage for whatever comes in life—everything lies in that.
There are more tears shed over answered prayers than over unanswered prayers.
In a similar vein, St. Therese of Lisieux offers:
True charity consists in bearing all our neighbor’s defects—not being surprised at their weakness, but edified at their smallest virtues.
Read all these aphorisms slowly and ponder them. It takes time for the meaning of some of them to really soak in. Like practicing hidden little acts of virtue. Like doing small things with great love. Like being gentle with others and stern with yourself.
Since participating in that church program last fall, I have tried to be conscious of my own small daily acts of kindness. As with keeping a gratitude journal, the process of tracking kindness builds on itself. And it gets easier over time—the opportunities to be kind are abundant, and the smallness of the actions make them a.most effortless.
During the pandemic, most of my small acts of kindness have been limited to household activities. Doing the laundry. Keeping the pantry stocked. Cooking meals or baking soda bread. Finding my husband’s books or keys or socks.
Occasionally, there is something a little bigger. Like shoveling snow off the neighbors’ walks, or striking up a pleasant conversation with a surly check-out clerk, or offering an encouraging comment to a writing partner.
And now there is preparing our tax returns. Yes, even preparing tax returns, when done out of love, is an act of kindness. As is balancing the bank account.
I’m far from perfect. As noted above, it’s hard to be kind when you’re cold. And I often leave the dishwasher unemptied.
But I find that couching my daily human activities as small acts of kindness to be done out of love makes me look for them more frequently and accomplish them in better humor. Because, as St. Teresa of Avila said, “May God protect me from gloomy saints.”
What small acts of kindness have you done recently?
Good word, Theresa!